Friendship between a man and a woman .... Is it possible? The issue of interest to many, but it is not easy to answer. Yes, reflections on this subject quite a lot, only unambiguous verdict is still no one ordered. One thing is clear - always, well, or almost always, such a friendship ends bed. Of course, this does not mean that the friendly relations come to an end, just these relationships acquire a completely different character. Men say that the friendship with the opposite sex is possible only in two cases: if they are former lovers, keep a good attitude, and if a man is gay.
With the first option is more or less clear - had a sexual relationship, but the feeling faded, people continue to communicate by habit: they share something in common from a past life - hobbies, work, even children. And what about the second case? My friend is gay: how to explain this strange but not uncommon modernity?
Girls friends with gay men, and this fact does not make them any inconvenience. Quite the contrary - they believe these relationships are stronger than friendship between women. Why is that, whether or not such a sincere friendship from girls or are they "give birth" because it is so fashionable?
Why there is friendship?
There are many examples of friendship girls males sexual orientation. Some people think that such relationships are fraught with a little secret - a girl who is friends with a gay person, as a rule, has an inferiority complex: it is either absent own personal life, or it is extremely dissatisfied with it.
As you know, a woman's happiness is family. A friendship with a gay gives women a sense of intimacy and usefulness. It seems that you're always close to the man, but at the same time, he never encroach on your freedom.
Many regard the friendship with a gay person as a drug that is addictive. After all, who has tried at least once to talk to them, looking to continue the relationship. Gay flatters vanity girls, because for him it is just a best friend and not a competitor. Note that re-imagine the husband of another gay man is almost impossible - they wind and treacherous as women.
Lack of jealousy
Gay Man will always be honest with the woman, because she never would be his sexual object or opponent. He will not gossip, as some "intimate girlfriends," will not try to discourage girlfriend Man. Emu is simply not necessary. A friend of the gay adequately assess the appearance of the girl with her to discuss this or that brand of underwear, sincere advise to buy a dress for a party, and at the same time never ask this dress reproach, spoiling it or forgetting to return.
And even if he is handsome as Apollo, the girl having a mediocre appearance or curvaceous, never will be completed next to it, as they share absolutely nothing - they are just good friends. By the way, the gay woman can adequately explain the principles of conduct of men in this or that situation, imagine yourself in her place and give good advice, and this will agree, it is very important to preserve the relationship.
Well, among other things, a gay friend can be sure that he is not smitten with her insane passion, while spoiling their friendship. However, for the last fact - everything is the envy of most girls. There are cases where women are falling in love with his "girlfriend", and there is already crumbling relationship, no matter how hard you try.
Friendship with gay lets cool the ardor of the jealous fiancé, strictly looking at his girlfriend's communication with the opposite sex - so say some women. In fact, things are not so simple. If a man is jealous, it does not stop, and all your statements, "he's gay, I do not wonder how a woman" came to nothing lead. Dissatisfaction with the side of your second half will still be, because for the ordinary man psychology of homosexuals is not clear, they refer to such people with caution, even with contempt. And the controversy in your life do not stop, they just go into a different direction. Your man does not understand "how to deal with this ... ??? "
Just imagine for a moment a situation: as long as you're shopping with a friend gay and choose your own new set of underwear, your man repairing a car with two lovely lesbians. ... How does it feel? Probably not very good. You rush headlong into the garage in order to clarify the situation. Therefore we should not be judged severely for failing to understand her man. And try to make friends with a gay man for the reason described above, it is not worth it.
This fact has led many women to reconsider their priorities in friendship. "If it is fashionable, then I want it! What I'm worse than others? "That begins to look for a girl friend of homosexuals in society, forgetting that true friendship will never be subservient to any trends. Gay - he's also a human being, he is not a lap dog, which is displayed on a walk, decorated with a pair of gems to show off to others.
In fact, these women are not interested in the life of a new friend, his habits and preferences, they are interested only by his sexual orientation. And so this relationship is doomed to failure. Of course it is effectively telling friends about gay friend, who understands everything, does not dismiss the gossip, support under any circumstances. But if you look at the situation on the other hand, it becomes a shame for a guy who became a complement to the fashionable image. Sadly, in general ...
Because together well
This is the latest and most reasonable cause of friendship with a gay. Sympathy, emerged from the first meeting and is pushing for the next dialogue - is the main component of the strong friendship between the people. If she is sincere in her feelings, she would never look for excuses to his friendship and to the question - "Why are you friends with gay? "Give a single correct answer -" because he was a good man, I'm with him easy and fun! "
It is this friendship is going to be a long and happy - when the first place are just human quality, desire to do for others something good cheer when he is sad. And to make it completely disinterested and sincere. As in the old Soviet cartoon about friends - "It's me flowers, and for what? "" And just like that! "
We recommend to check out how to forget the guy you love
When noise becomes a violation of the law
Talk to neighbors
call the police
Refer to court
Agree, a fairly common situation: you have a nice apartment, but the thought that you will have to return to it after a day, unwittingly makes you wince. The trouble is that, being at home, you are completely unable to relax. You have noisy neighbors - what to do if you were not so lucky? It does not matter what kind of noise they produce; most importantly, that thereby they invade your personal space and do not give you the benefit of a vacation, that like all of us are guaranteed by law. But this is the law, as we know, not all write. And then what to do? Whether it is possible to influence the troublemakers? What action should take, where to go and what to demand?
When noise becomes a violation of the law
First you need to soberly assess the situation to see whether your neighbors are breaking the law. After all, it defines the scope of permissible noise; but you see someone and the squeak of a mosquito on your nerves, and does not sleep! And the situation may be different. It is not necessary that you prevent it noisy neighbors; it is possible that anxiety brings located near your home building, stalls selling music CDs with daily audio advertising of products sold, located on the first floor of your house restaurant and so on. Well, let's deal in order.
First of all, let us remember what the law says about the noise. And it determines that a twenty-three o'clock to seven o'clock in the morning, nothing should disturb the citizens. Exclusion of "Law of Silence" does only for those cases where the noise accompanied by works that are carried out to eliminate the consequences of accidents, and various natural disasters, as well as actions aimed at the prevention of all kinds of offenses. In addition, the law allows you to break the silence if to worship (eg, the ringing of bells of the Orthodox Church) or approved by the authorities held cultural events.
It is important and the power of noise. Thus, the law provides for compliance with health standards (permissible limit of noise), not only at night but also during the day. The level of noise can be measured, for this there are special devices. "The law about the noise" dictates the following conditions: in the period from seven o'clock in the morning and twenty-three pm the noise level should not exceed forty decibels. And at night - that is, with twenty-three o'clock to seven o'clock in the morning - the allowable noise level is only thirty decibels. How do you know that in reality is a level of noise? As the saying goes, everything is relative. Let us, and we will compare! A simple example: when speaking person generates noise about sixty-five decibels. Alarm clock - it is eighty decibels. Sound the alarm under the windows of parked cars - about one hundred decibels.
Of course, it is unrealistic to expect that every day will unswervingly follow the established norm, taking care not to break the law. And the night does not always have to rely on complete silence. It is one thing if noises occur from time to time, and quite another - if on a regular basis. Especially sad when a holiday is hampered noisy neighbors. And what do you do in that case?
Talk to neighbors
Generally most common two types of reaction to noisy neighbors. Firstly, it's angry response. I must say that anger anyone yet does not resolve certain issues. The second type of reaction - to accept and tolerate the noise and continue. You would think that still can not do anything, and even if there is a "Law of Silence", no one will rush to your aid and will not rise to a defense. In the end, if you endure the noise from the neighbors for a long time, even the most humble man finally comes the reaction of the first type - he gets angry.
And he and the other type of reaction are undesirable because with their help, you will achieve nothing. To avoid negative consequences, we advise you to resort to a simple and reliable way: just try to peacefully talk to your neighbors about excessive noise that annoys you. If you do this calmly and politely, it may be that you can easily and for all get rid of the problem.
It may even find that your neighbor did not know that he had become a source of discomfort for you. For example, a stereo set to switch at a time when he is at work. Configured people - and I forget! And to know does not know that every day sounds coming out of his apartment, preventing you from sleep after the night shift. Or did not meet to establish a triggered car alarms constantly, not realizing that in your ninth floor of her perfectly audible.
Be that as it may, your neighbor you consciously or unconsciously interfere with - try to calmly lead their arguments that it interferes with your rest. Remind him that the law provides for compliance with certain rules of silence, not only at night but also during the day. Often faced with the fact that people only know about the need to be quiet at night, and that the law establishes a framework for noise during the day - they know not all. Talk about it with your neighbors and try to find a compromise solution.
call the police
If your efforts to resolve peacefully all did not work, then seek help from law enforcement. The law is the law and its violation should be punished. You have to show the police that tried to solve the noise problem on their own. Tell us how many times you turned to neighbors and some suggested solutions to break the deadlock. Tell us about how and how often the noise is and how strong he is. It is desirable that your story was reinforced by the testimony of someone else from the neighborhood.
It is best to call the police at a time when the neighbors make loud noise. This will serve as the best proof of a violation of your rights to rest, that you are guaranteed by law. And the police will be able to personally assess the level of noise. Just be prepared for the fact that then you have to wait until the appropriate protocols will be drawn up, to sign them. Presumably, it will give you a little pleasure, especially when it happens at night; but this is the order, and law enforcement officials can not violate it.
What threatens troublemakers citizens? The law provides for the imposition of a warning or a fine. The fine - from a thousand to two thousand rubles, if the penalty is imposed on citizens, from four to eight thousand - for officials and from forty to eighty thousand - for legal entities.
Refer to court
Going to court - it's a last resort. If the application to the police to no avail, it is an appeal to the civil court will help you decide what to do with noisy neighbors. Unfortunately, most people are hesitant to take such a step, limited to the police. People think: "If even the police did not help me, you have no one to help! Well, in fact, do not run well on the courts because of the fact that the neighbor's son loves music in the style of hard metal! Himself will be more expensive. "
And it is in vain think so! The law is on your side, and to find justice on his offenders is always possible. Besides, can you imagine that, every day experiencing noise attacks, you are putting your health at serious risk? According to research, the constant noise just eighty decibels (recall ordinary human speech is approximately sixty - sixty-five decibels) can quite quickly damage your hearing. Regular exposure to noise in excess of one hundred decibels can cause hearing loss, and the noise level of a hundred and ten decibels above causes concussion. But still it is worth mentioning shattered nervous system and malfunction due to the constant lack of sleep.
Therefore, do not neglect the opportunity to go to court. Your ultimate goal - to stop the noise, and for this we must use all possible ways. You may be surprised at how effective way to soothe your restless neighbor one fact call him to court! In order to win the case in court, you must provide proof that you are a victim of constant excessive noise, and what your neighbor is the source of the noise.
Still you will need to show that you previously tried to solve the matter peacefully and asked his neighbor to take action to limit noise. As proof you can show copies of letters that you wrote to the neighbor, the stories of witnesses, recording the noise made by a recorder, and a chronicle of your calls to the police. Your own stories about the actions of noisy neighbors will also be taken into account. If you had to seek medical care because of the inability to maintain a good performance, the cause of which was lack of proper rest, the documents from the clinic, too, need to attach to the evidence.
If your evidence deemed sufficient, the court rules in your favor. How exactly will this decision - it depends on each situation. This may be all the same fine, compensation for moral or material (if, for example, repair, neighbors started from the top, you have fallen plaster from the ceiling) harm. In some cases, the decision to evict tenants who deliberately violate the rules of the hostel.
But if you do not want to communicate with your neighbors, you will be only one - to make repairs to enhance the insulation in your home. However, this will do little soundproof rooms at the area, but the noise and noisy neighbors you will forget forever!