Relationship daughter-in-law - this is certainly fertile ground for the activities of psychologists. Learn, system theory, write a dissertation and publishes books with tips - they are sure to be popular with consumers. After all, each daughter-in shower dreams to mend relations with his second mother, as if she did not refuse it to others. And many in-laws are not so formidable as they seem from the outside.
Think about relationships in your family. Maybe it's not all as bad as you think. And if your mother in law, somehow makes the attempt with you friends, and you do not care how it applies to you, and on the question of what to give in-law for an anniversary, you start to think a month before the occasion - you have a chance to establish a relationship with " impregnable "the mother of her husband.
Who's the master?
Unfortunately, over the years, beloved mother of your husband has forgotten what it means to be young that their own mistakes quickly learn to cope with life's difficulties. And so she tries to teach his "good for nothing" daughter everything she knows.
If you're lucky, the two women find a common language to communicate peacefully and even gladly come to visit each other. But often the situation is, and vice versa, especially if the young live under the same roof with her husband's parents. Then in-law is not just sent to the guests, and rightfully goes to all the rooms in the apartment. Maybe even start a cleaning in the room of a young couple or advise how to cook, do laundry, raise children. And for the most part this is not done out of spite or malice, but from a pure heart and a desire to share their own experiences. Of course, there are exceptions, but let's hope they are a minority.
The main thing that you do not forget - in-law is also a woman, and women are not alien to her weakness. A woman like that? Of course gifts! And if the gift is "right", any, even the most strict mother in law relent and stop to look at you as a stupid child. So much for the cease-fire, the main thing now is to maintain the truce competently, so that in the end, your family came the real world!
Some subtleties in preparation for the holidays
It was during the holidays, you can either strengthen the friendship and daughter-in-law, or to correct shaky peace if their relationship is strained. But one mistake, one gift at random may, on the contrary, to build a wall between women, which will be envied even the Chinese.
So before you think about what to give in-law, to remember all that you know about it. In this case, every detail is important, each of your conversation. Oh, and be sure to talk with her husband - who, unless he knows that he prefers his mother.
Let's start with the most grandiose and the most difficult because of the holiday - the anniversary. So, what is present in this important day for any woman?
This has already happened that women do not like to celebrate their birthdays, and the older we get, the less this love. So try to surround the mother-in-focus, but unobtrusively so it was not like pity.
Of course, we must be sure to offer assistance in the preparation of the festive dinner. Anniversaries mark is widely accepted, so the extra hands superfluous just will not. Well, until you alone circled the kitchen, you can chance to see how fresh it looks like a gracefully cope with household chores and kitchen. Praise recipes and serving. In short, pay attention to the little things, because no man does not notice them, but we all know how much they mean and how nice that someone has seen and appreciated our efforts.
Pay attention to all the little things
Gift-law on such a momentous celebration probably a couple of months will be the main theme of your reflection. And in the end you will still be thinking that made the wrong choice, "and maybe we had something completely different? "- This thought will not leave you, until you see the reaction of the culprit celebration.
The question what to give in-law in the first place will depend even on your relationship with her, and the relationship between her and her son, that is your husband. If the relationship is strained, it is likely you-in-law, too, not girlfriends, then, on the one hand, it's easier - a gift does not necessarily put the soul. As a result, and the nerves will tselee.
But if the relationship between the mother and son are warm, you have more room for imagination, because all you need, you can ask your husband. After all, his mother can complain about the broken iron, to dream of a new TV. Can you tell us that such and such a forum of the beautiful wellness deducted pension and always wanted to go there.
Or maybe you are together once walked to the shops, and remember that one day it just conquered earrings that are so ideally suited to its new dress, but then it was not possible for them to spend, and then somehow no longer relevant It was. Again, all of the same stuff, but how much they can help, if you notice them.
The finishing touch to gift-in-law did not even have to be flowers, but they are required for any holiday, and the card. Yes, today we rarely use them, but even if you are sure that it is a relic of the past, particularly on the holiday and choose to make an exception for the mother-especially beautiful card. Type in the word are always beautiful, but they are not enough. His hand append some warm and sincere wishes, they will always be pleased to re-read.
Do not forget about interests and hobbies
Gifts-in-law on the basis, for example, of her hobbies. Maybe she's a fanatical fan of theater or opera? Or maybe it is not visible on the balcony of the sky because of the houseplants? And maybe in the house has its own, albeit not very big, but the library?
Hobbies greatly simplifies the choice of a gift, but do not exclude the possibility to be trapped. For example, if in-law loves classical theater productions, do not try to attach it to contemporary art, this can be interpreted as imposing your personal tastes.
Houseplants also choose wisely. Now you can find very beautiful exotic flowers, but unfortunately they do not try, they do not survive in our urban apartments, and indeed in our climate. A ruined the plant-in-law just upset.
Each library is based on the personal preferences, so that here too there is a danger not guess. The main thing is not to leave the choice of gift on the last day, then you will have the opportunity to clarify the first preference in-law, and then another, and to travel around half of the city, but to find exactly what you need.
Yes, gifts described above are very simple and not expensive. However, in the case of the native people, money does not have any of the values. Even a small thing, presenting a pure heart, will bring more joy than a diamond necklace, a hastily selected in the store.
Gifts that are useful for body and soul
If no apparent interest from your mother in law does not, then, her hobbies - she is. Absolutely normal for a woman of any age love yourself, cherish, care for themselves. Such a woman can give, for example, a subscription to the spa. or a certificate in a good salon. Or again certified in cosmetic or jewelry store.
The advantage of certificates that mother-in itself be able to choose for himself the desired product or process. But the anti-cellulite cream or shampoo hair loss can easily hurt, no matter how much they cost, as too clearly point to the shortcomings of the exterior. Agree, is not pleased any woman.
If in-law spends more time in the kitchen than in the mirror, to win her colorful cookbook, or search the book for writing prescriptions, preferably thicker, do not forget, mother in law - a woman of experience, recipes, she certainly knows a lot. Nor are unnecessary pans, pots and other kitchen utensils.
Do not forget that there are other festivals besides the anniversary ..
Gifts-in-law on other holidays, albeit less ambitious but no less responsible in terms of selection of gift? Mother's Day, birthday of your husband and her son. By the way, if you really want to improve relations with his mother in law, sure to find out when her birthday party. Oh, she knows something, believe me .. And if you do not forget about the greeting - it will be a pleasant surprise for her.
In such holidays is sometimes enough buketa her favorite flowers, kind words and, of course, attention. If you can not invite to visit or come in person, try a little longer to talk on the phone, ask her the news, issues, experiences, health, and be sure to share your joys and sorrows, then she will feel that her opinion is important to you that it is not stranger. And it will be the best gift for any mother in law!
At the end of all this I want to add that to the heart of any man to be found not let the road, but the path exactly. And no matter how expensive, and the best was not your gift, it will lose its value if not accompanied by warm words and good attitude.