The question whether there is a friendship between a man and a woman is similar to the issue that came to light earlier - the chicken or the egg. We try hard to solve it unequivocally. Does not work. There are many examples that the representatives of different sexes, with strong marriages are friends for many years. However, there is no guarantee that such a relationship is not the slightest hint of desire for intimacy. It is possible that someone from friends, no, no, yes and melknёt any frivolous little thought. In any case, the probability of it is admissible. Therefore, women whose husbands have maintained relationships with some of the fairer sex, often the question arises: what to do if there was a friend of her husband, or she was? And indeed, what to do and how to behave?
A married man and his girlfriend
Friendly relations between her husband and another woman often cause us confusion. He is, you see, is constantly communicating with his unmarried girlfriend, walks with her on some activities, takes with him, going on a picnic with his family, invites anniversaries and holidays, it helps her. In short, it behaves as if the friend - the closest person. And one thing, when the faithful are regularly in contact with their classmates or schoolmates. It's quite another when he is on friendly terms with those with whom you met, while still free. In the first case, the eternal conversation about Masha, Tanya, Katyusha, Lena and her presence in his house is still possible to understand and justify. And in the second to make it more complicated. After all, our half was earlier this Masha, Tanya, Lena Katyusha or love!
Even worse, when her husband suddenly announced friend after the wedding. The sudden urge to communicate with other young lady, of course, causes resentment and suspicion. Yes, beloved insists that it is just a friendship. And that is not burdened by his family friend, as a woman, was not interested. And he did as a man, too. But once such statements are not very hard to believe. And not because her husband is able to sleep with anyone. And because the stronger sex are often quite naive. But the fairer half of humanity often use it.
No self-respecting man will not be able to deny a woman, if she had asked for help. Of course, he agrees to move her furniture to hold home late in the evening, learn how to deal with a computer and so on. It should be just right to ask the lady. And we usually ask? Right. We use it consciously or unconsciously, the power of its charm. The normal male reaction, in this case - to provide service to the poor thing that is so fascinating about this begs! And he helped in something the first time, helped the second time, to help the third. And then it's become a habit and it was almost an obligation.
As a result, the man starts to perceive a woman as part of his circle of close friends. He is worried about what is happening in the life of a friend, and how this is reflected in itself. As for the ladies, it is this state of affairs is quite satisfied. A friend always at hand and ready to respond at the first call. Often in her heart she cherishes the hope for closer relations. Maybe it is not so. But who knows, who knows ...
Well, what about his wife if there was a friend of her husband, which he sometimes gives a large part of his time? The situation, I must say, is not simple. You can, of course, scandals and set ultimatums like: "Either me or her! "But if it works as it should? I think no. Rather, it hurts. The spouse will avoid arguments, and it is likely that one day decides to take a break from the conflicts have girlfriends. It is, of course, understand, sorry, will warm. And there, and close to sin.
How to behave, to keep out because of the faithful friend to the bottom of the family boat?
When a friend of her husband's dangerous
In general, the fact that the husband had a girlfriend, or she was before marriage, there is nothing catastrophic. Usually men do not believe that by marrying, they should avoid friendship with the opposite sex. And I do not see anything wrong with that, to maintain friendly relations with its representative, to help them, to support, advise something. Therefore, so much to get nervous because of the husband's girlfriend just not worth it. First you need to look at their relations and define their characteristics.
If the man and woman have an invisible bond to hide it would be quite difficult. Such intimacy can be seen in their views on each other, in the words inadvertently abandoned, the desire at least for a few minutes to be alone in touch. When mixed with friendly relations to something else, the people in the conversation my tone of voice. In it appear the intimate tone. No matter how carefully a husband with his girlfriend or conspiring wife always intuitively feel that they, besides friendship, united by something else.
The risk of such a connection between our life partner and his buddy is especially great when a man appeared girlfriend after his marriage. Relations with those with whom he met before the wedding, less dangerous. Such friends are familiar for a long time and know each other very well. The love of the stage has already been passed, and usually return to her there. If falling in love has passed and transformed into friendship, it is unlikely to come to life once again. Yet to keep abreast necessary. Not you? Often, women complain that her husband has changed with his girlfriend, with whom he almost from the cradle. And the prerequisite for something like this was not ... And that's what happened.
Well, anyway, with old friend of her husband still here and there. They need to take more as standard luggage, not as rivals. But when all of a sudden has got a faithful friend in the period of family life, it is alarming and makes thoughtful. It may well be that this woman appeared in his life purpose. No, the faithful do not necessarily wants to bask in her arms. It is likely that his thoughts are pure and kind-hearted. But what ideas and goals nest in the mind of the ladies - it is unknown. Not every girl will dare to maintain a friendship with a married man without prior acquaintance with his wife. Somehow it is not comme il faut for a single person - start friendly relations with a family man, and regularly call him to meet, not trying to get close to his wife. The woman, whose mind there is nothing criminal, to behave this way is unlikely to be.
Initially, a lady can be for the faithful likeness vests. It will demonstrate a full understanding of his experience and deep sympathy that every man is a very valuable factor. As a result, instead of having to share the most sore from his half, he will talk heart to heart with the "vest". Because the "vest" in every way trying to look wise and benevolent wife. Having established a strong spiritual contact with her yet another, she herself begins to him to complain about his miserable life. Well then the man does not show compassion and sympathy to the one that has always supported in difficult times, not to reassure her and to take care of? After all, he is - the stronger sex!
In principle, it is viewed from the point of view of humanity, it is absolutely normal. As long as the woman begins to speculate on his position and will not complain too much because every detail and ask for help. Well, if the man is tired and one day it will stop with the "poor lamb" close contact. And if not, then a friendship with her can become a threat to family well-being. Because sympathy from the man often becomes attached to the woman and creates a desire all the time take care of her. And it may be, it starts to give her friend even longer than his wife. That usually happens in such cases, it is hardly worth a lot of talk. Even if the "poor lamb" and will break the family, the relationship between the spouses certainly spoil for a long time.
So how do you relate to her friends of her husband, and which method to choose the behavior when they threaten to become a rival?
Methods of influence on her husband's friendship with another woman
In fact, his wife try to influence the faithful friendship with a lady needed only when this person is not very eager to rendezvous with her. And if her husband's girlfriend willing and friendly talks with all members of the family of his friend, congratulating them on holidays, prepares birthday gifts and tries to help solve some family matters, what really nervous, then? Let friends with her husband as much as necessary. But in the eyes of the whole family.
For those persons who nazvanivayut men with or without cause, constantly about something and ask for somewhere inviting, avoiding intercourse with his wife - here it is necessary to take some measures. The easiest way - to establish a friendly relationship girlfriend husband. You can respond to her call blagovernomu and talk a few minutes about nothing. And if she is somewhere calls man to go with him on the road and grab a cake for tea. Yes, in the end, that the lady had no illusions, call her and complain about the fact that this type of ungrateful got himself some tsypu and sends her gentle SMSes. In a word, to include fantasy and try to neutralize the obsession special and make a husband and a friend had a fight. You look, and restrain his ardor.
In general, if the husband was got a girlfriend, it would be necessary poraskinut brains and look for the cause. Just because nothing happens. Probably, when dealing with her man gets what he lacks in family relations. Rather, he experienced a spiritual hunger, and reaches out to the one that is able to satisfy this hunger. This connection can be interrupted if your mate become an even greater friend than she. This means that we must genuinely interested in his experiences, support in difficult times, to treat with understanding and share their passions and often talk heart to heart. And then a man in need of a friend disappears. It will communicate with her less and less, and then all would be to call only on holidays.
In general, oddly enough, a friend of her husband even useful in the family. Firstly, they can be learn a lot about his missus. Secondly, the type of character friend's wife helps to understand what it lacks in dialogue with his half. Third, if the woman is really just a friend, she is able to help men better understand the family relationships and give good advice. So let them play well. But in the presence of his wife!