"What child would not play, if only has not brought in the lap! "I'm sure everyone has heard such a joke. However, as they say, every joke there is some joke. In the last century nebrachnye children and early pregnancy caused sharply negative attitude of others. And if the ratio of children born out of wedlock in our time has become more tolerant, early pregnancy is still by others is only condemnation.
Officially early pregnancy - a pregnancy, which came at the girl, not who reached 18 years of age. Incidentally, it is for this reason early pregnancy is often referred to as a teenage. But the problem is not quite that girl at the time of pregnancy has not reached the age of majority, and that often such a pregnancy is the result of habitat, which is forced to live a teenage girl. And very rarely it promotes the welfare of the future child.
Why is this happening?
More often than not, many people see the main disadvantage of early pregnancy that young moms turn away from family and in general all the people around. But this is absolutely not true - unfortunately, the girls from relatives in most cases turned away long before pregnancy. And pregnancy in most cases it is a consequence of this!
Let's try to figure out why there are early pregnancy. So:
Rape of girls
Alas, in our time of rape continue to occur frequently. And in most cases they do not commit evil maniacs and surrounding female male representatives. By the way, including my mother's friends. Whose oversight that girl "Spin" is not in the circle of your own?
Yes, and if the girl was raped by a stranger on the street, there is a natural question arises - why it is late at night on the street alone? I could not stand the unfavorable psychological home environment? Or parents simply do not care where and with whom their young daughter? Although, of course, there are indeed tragic situation where the entire blame becomes an unfortunate situation.
Statistics show that far more often than other pregnant women associated with so-called "bad companies". That may be true, but have you ever thought why a child falls into this same company? Most often this occurs when a child is left to his own - usually it happens in the event that parents devote all his time to work, or are antisocial lifestyle.
And sometimes it can happen in a very happy family where the parents hold the child in the "iron fist." Excessive strictness also not good if the parents do not even try to understand your child. And in the end she went to look for understanding of the street. And get into bad company - a matter of time.
Lack of knowledge
Strange as it may seem, but often teenage pregnancy are a direct consequence of the lack of basic knowledge of the girl. Despite the fact that all information is freely available, many girls are totally ignorant in matters of sex. A recent poll of senior pupils showed that about 40% of girls truly believe that during the first sexual intercourse is impossible to conceive, 25% of girls are sure that after cleaning the sexual act eliminates the chance of pregnancy. And about 90% of girls are not able to find the right means of contraception.
Moreover, most girls are not able in time to realize that they are pregnant - simply did not notice the delay of menstruation, and increasing the size of clothing attributed to the need to adhere to a strict diet. Unfortunately, this is - entirely parental oversight. That girl in the family had to tell simple truths. Moreover - she must know that she can always consult with her mother.
Yes, do not be surprised! Sometimes it happens - the girl deliberately planning a pregnancy. Typically, this occurs in two cases. Firstly, the way she tries to assert itself - it seems that nobody likes and nobody needs it. And she decides to have a baby, believing that he will always love her.
And secondly, so a teenager can express protest against the excessive, in its view, the custody of the parents. Like, "I stop to raise, I'm an adult and she can be a mother! ". Of course, pregnancy in this case serves as another proof of immaturity girls, but not her sanity.
What to do?
All about pregnancy is in any case a great shock for a woman - even if she is married and very pregnant. And for teenage girls, and even more so. And as in any emergency situation, you need to know exactly how to proceed:
Consult your doctor!
If the girl began to suspect that she was pregnant, in any case, do not procrastinate and hope for a miracle - itself "will not resolve." It shall as soon as possible address to the gynecologist. By the way, pay attention to the choice of doctor. If after the first few words of your doctor sends you for your parents, you can safely look for another doctor.
Of course, no serious procedure, the doctor without parental consent will not do. But check the availability of pregnancy, help her prepare for the inevitable conversation with the parents the good doctor will never give up.
Tell the child's father
Be sure to inform the board of the child's father. Pregnancy involve two parties. So, and shared responsibility.
Talk with parents
No matter how terrible the conversation did not seem, it can not be avoided. So do not tighten too much - tell all parents. Of course, we do not expect that you pat on the head. But, most likely, a storm of emotions will soon subside and the parents finally realize a simple and support you.
In that case, if your gynecologist's office she heard ridicule or try to shame and to talk with parents is almost impossible, she can turn for help to one of the crisis centers, whose activities are aimed precisely at supporting young people. To date, there are similar centers in almost all major cities. Of course, the experts of the Centre for the girl decide what action to take in this situation. But they support it in any way - provide the required information, if necessary, facilitate in addressing medical and household matters.
Of course, the girl got in this situation, will hear the many diverse councils - from doctors, friends, and parents. But it is very important to carefully weigh everything and make your own decision, which does not depend on anybody. Remember - this is your and only your child. And that you will be responsible for the lives and well-being of the little man.
Virtually no mother will not accept the news of the pregnancy of his young daughter with joy. As a rule, in most cases, the first reaction - the aggression and numerous accusations against his daughter and the whole of the world as a whole. However, my mother is worth considering - but someone must be to blame, really?
Of course, if you want to find the culprit - you can find him. But to solve the problem it will not help you. Especially since most of the main culprits of this phenomenon, as mentioned above, it is becoming parents. And in particular - the mother of the girl. It was her fault that it was not possible to establish a warm and trusting relationship with his daughter. But for teenagers it is very, very important!
By the way, it is often explained by maternal aggression and subconscious protest, which she might not suspect. For example: "I'm too young and I can not be a grandmother! "" How dare you to do something without my knowledge or consent! ". And if my grandfather who became pregnant in the first place is to seek help from a gynecologist, her mother is visiting a psychologist. Unfortunately, in most cases the mother protests teenager rely only on her subconscious complexes.
For example, a woman insists on an abortion, even if all the objective reasons indicate its unacceptability. And in fact, she is afraid of becoming catastrophically grandmother - because she's only about 35 years old! Of course, that all of its essence rebels against this injustice. Or, for example, a woman is pathologically afraid that with the birth of her own child her daughter will be independent and will no longer be wholly hers.
And sometimes vice versa - despite the fact that the girl all the forces opposed to the birth of a child has serious disease or pregnancy, for example, is the result of violence, her mother insists on the birth of this child. And not always a woman works for the good of her daughter. Sometimes this decision was dictated by the desire to link daughters - teens hands and feet that they are entirely dependent on their parents. And sometimes the young grandmother intend to use the baby as a lever daughter.
Of course, the future grandmother can be indignant after reading these lines. But do not immediately deny it and refuse to visit a specialist. The psychologist will help you understand yourself and find a common language with his daughter. As they say, never too late to learn. Learn to be a friend of his daughter. After all, she is now and so have to be very difficult - early pregnancy is a very serious challenge for teens!
In any case, you have to decide - to give birth or have an abortion. And in fact, and in another case to begin should visit a gynecologist. Doctor will prescribe the necessary examination and provide recommendations. As a rule, most of the doctors is not recommended to interrupt the first pregnancy. And it's not just teens. However, if the decision to terminate a pregnancy, to delay this unpleasant procedure is not necessary.
Of course, for the body girls - teenagers any abortion would be a major blow. But of two evils choose the lesser need - vacuum aspiration will bring much less harm to the body of a young girl. In addition, it will reduce the chance of developing all kinds of complications that often develop even in adult women, not to mention teenagers. Although, of course, the final decision on the method of abortion, the doctor will make.
Well, if you decide that the child has the right to life and decided to give birth, your most loyal ally in the next 9 months, should also become a gynecologist. Pregnancy in adolescents has a number of its features, so must proceed under strict medical supervision. The sooner you contact them the better for you and the future remains. As a rule, major cities can be found gynecologists specialize management of pregnancy in adolescents. But if you live in a small town, do not despair - you certainly district gynecologist successfully cope with this task.
The earliest a pregnancy would be joyful and exciting event in the life of a young mom, if it occurs in a calm psychological situation, with the support of loved ones. After all, life's challenges, as well as young age, is a temporary phenomenon. And your child will be the families and friends of the little man for life! And believe me - enjoy the brilliant crafty eye, leaping laughter and sonorous golosochkom calling "Mama! "I do not go to any comparison with the pleasure of a visit to a night club. And education is available and being a mother - it would wish. Be happy!